Hello, World!

Mark Ricker
Owner, Host, Jedi Master

I started Beat the Geek Trivia in 2009 when I was recently divorced, unemployed, and a little drunk. I had always had a head full of trivial knowledge, but just knowing things like Albert Einstein’s middle name wasn’t getting me very far in life, so I put that useless knowledge to use. Since then, Beat the Geek Trivia has grown beyond my expectations and is now a full time job for me.

Before Beat the Geek, I worked in IT, sales and business development, and mortgage lending. I shaved my head in 2001 and never looked back. I don’t have any kids or pets, but I’ve kept a houseplant alive for over 10 years (I think I might be ready for a goldfish now). I was born in New York, but I’m a Chargers fan. In my spare time, I invent new ways to insult Ariana Grande and negative reviews of the movie Armageddon. My go-to drink is the legendary Marktini.

email Mark

Mike Faris
Host, Manager, protocol droid fluent in over 6 million forms of communication

I gave the worst performance of my life as an 18-year-old at summer camp while emceeing a talent show. After that night I may have never picked up a microphone again except that later that year my college dorm wanted me to host the school-wide lip-syncing contest. Not bad, but not all that good either. These days I’m pretty comfortable behind the microphone whether it’s as the public address announcer for high school basketball games, the master of ceremonies for more wedding receptions than I recall, or hosting trivia for years now.

Highlights in my life up to this point are riding the bike from the ET movie at Universal Studios, winning the grand prize in a radio station giveaway for a Felix Hernandez signed baseball and discovering I don’t like Waldorf salad. My geek credentials include that I’ve willingly been to a Star Trek convention, I read tech blogs every day, and that my mother-in-law says that I’m “good with the computers”. Next time you’re at trivia, fill me in on some of your geek cred.

email Mike

David Zazzo
Host, Marksman Stormtrooper

Hi there, I’m David – but most people call me Zazzo.

My best friend and I stumbled across Beat the Geek Trivia in 2016 at one of our guys’ nights and have loved it ever since. After playing for several months, I thought to myself, “it would be really fun to be a trivia host.” I talked to Mark, gave it a shot and auditioned, and here we are!

By day, I work at a local software company doing cloud-y things. By night, though, I indulge my strong passion for technical arts and production – lighting design, audio engineering, video engineering, etc. When I’m not geeking out on that stuff, you can find me at Sounders FC home games cheering on the boys in Rave Green.

I’m excited to be your Beat the Geek Trivia host!

email Zazzo

Brad Lakey
Host, Death Star Garbage Chute Maintenance Technician

I was born and raised in the PNW and have been all over the world since for a myriad of reasons. I’ve always had a problem forgetting things I really need to remember (like my wife’s name) and remembering things that bear absolutely no relevance to any real-life situation (Emperor Caligula’s name translates to “little booty”). I always chalk it up to multiple TBIs but that never really fixes anything. In 2012, I started playing Beat the Geek Trivia, and I suddenly found a use for all of my useless knowledge.

I enjoy the outdoors, board games, retro video games, tasty (and not tasty) beer, marksmanship, and geeking out about whatever tv or movie franchise I’m currently indulging in. I’m a huge Huskies and Mariners fan. I also enjoy sharing what little knowledge of consequence I possess with others and learning new things (which I’ll probably quickly forget). I’m fascinated with social themes and history and how we manage to keep messing it up. The tiny bright side of such a crazy story is that we get lots of cool trivia knowledge, which I get to read at local watering holes, and you can get rewarded for knowing.

See you there!

email Brad

Clint Cheves
Host, C-3P0’s Psychotherapist

Hey!

I’m Clint and I am one of those stupid millennials. I have a fear of change. I still live 15 minutes from where I was born, and I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon. Pop culture, movies, music, technology, ancient history, and general nerdom have always been a big part of my life; just ask the people that cheated off me in high school.

While the rest of my friends were scoring touchdowns, I spent my nights reading an episode-by-episode synopsis of Scrubs. It took until the seventh grade for me to get out of my pre-pubescent cocoon and, despite my Coke machine-like physique, I started playing sports. I never forgot my first love of knowing things that probably won’t matter, though, but it now included athletics.

I love sports, technology, religion, the Lakers, and [censored]. My other loves are Jameson, a good light beer, and [censored]. I’m super stoked to be doing trivia for you guys. Let’s get drinks and talk pop culture!

email Clint

Jax Alspaugh
Host, Palpatine’s Cosmetician

I’ve worked in a variety of industries and positions – marketing, customer correspondent for a prostate supplement company, barista, birthday party hostess at a bowling alley, apartment complex manager, CNA, laser hair removal technician, snowboard instructor, and car saleswoman.

At my audition, I bragged about being the MC in 5th grade for my elementary school’s talent show. I love entertaining, having done both stand up comedy and performed with a band playing a mean cowbell. I also currently host karaoke on the weekends.

Besides trivia, I LOVE cheese, wine tasting, breweries, dancing, gaming, brunch, a GOOD bloody Mary, a well crafted/ironic mustache, live music, roller skating, vintage style/thrift store clothes shopping, supporting my community, and time with my family. Seeing my only son graduate from WSU in 2020 with his Bachelor’s in Social Sciences will be my proudest moment.

It should go without saying, but I’ll say it again, GO COUGS!

email Jax

Miriam Krainacker
Host, Podracer Pit Crew President

Dia dhuit, geeks! Which is Irish for “Hello, ….. geeks” (Irish doesn’t translate super well).

I’m a Montana child, but have been a Seattle transplant for the last few years. I haven’t been kicked out yet! I’m a history nerd at heart, and I even spent four years at the University of Montana to get a piece of paper to prove it. Along with that, I spent a few years learning the history & language of my potato-loving ancestors, hence the Irish in the greeting. My pre-trivia life has consisted of a lot of different areas, including a brief EMT stint, a trial barista period (did NOT go well – I am better at drinking it than making), and a lovely couple of years as a tour guide of Pike Place Market. Nowadays, I’m a dog bather here in West Seattle Island. When I’m not spending my days wrangling and bathing dogs, I like to spend my evenings watching the weirdest documentaries I can find. Or cross stitching while listening to mellow jazz, living my best “retired” life.

After a year of attending Beat the Geek trivia at Ounces, I bullied my way into the host position. Hope to see you for a drink & some guesses soon! Slainte!!

email Miriam

Courtney Parham
Host, Darth Vader’s CPAP Technician

I’m Princess Courtney, Chairperson of the Galactic Prom Committee and supreme ruler of Planet Sucralose. At age 13, I was designated as the Protector of Galactic Freedom and Designer Fashion by King Zeus. He gave me three magical tools: The Fairy Wings of Gollum, the Emerald Wand of Horcrux, and a gorgeous Louis Vuitton studded black leather handbag with faux fur trim and a pocket for my iPhone.

I promise to protect the freedom of every sentient being in the galaxy and to gently but firmly advise on haute couture, as is my charge, as is my oath.

email Courtney

Ryan Zwirner
Host, Tatooine Sand Appraiser

Hey there!

About me: I’m 6’3”, because apparently that matters. I’m from Southern California (don’t judge) -I moved up to Washington 7 years ago and love it so far.

In my free time you’ll usually find me kayaking, telling dad jokes, brewing beer, pretending I like hiking, or being lazy and copy/pasting my Tinder bio when people ask me for “a blurb for the website”.

Lets grab a drink!

PS. Must love dogs.

email Ryan

Ben Brockman
Host, Ordained Ewok Funeral Officiant

I am proud to be known as the first ever inductee to the “Beat the Geek Trivia Host Hall Of Fame,” an honor I bestowed upon myself without the knowledge or approval of anyone else.

When not memorizing release dates and chart/sales performance of every popular movie and album released since the 1970’s, I can be found crashing neighborhood parties throughout the Puget Sound region, where I serenade confused attendees with “Wonderwall,” the most under-performed guy-with-a-guitar song of all time. I avoid being depressed during the wet and dreary months by cheering on our local sports teams live and in person as they inevitably fail in the biggest moments.

I can also beat the original Super Mario Bros on NES in 8 minutes and 30 seconds; it’s not a record time or anything, but I think it’s a pretty decent effort.

email Ben

You?
Host

Beat the Geek Trivia is always looking for energetic and funny trivia hosts. If you think you sound good on a microphone, you like talking in front of a crowd, and you’re not a moron, you should audition.

email Mark if you’re interested.